I Feel Nothing
by Pyro146
Summary: They meant it only to be a physical release, nothing more than a way to burn off adrenaline. As their feelings grew they continued lying to themselves until it became impossible. He saw through the assassin to the woman underneath, she ignored the perfect soldier and saw only a good man. It took a single smile to complicate everything between them. Rated M warnings in each chapter.


**This will most likely be a short couple of chapters story, depends on the reviews so if you like it let me know. Also if you don't like it I'm open to criticism. Give it a chance it's going to be full of smut I can tell you that much and there will be clear warnings at the top of each chapter if you want to skip because this gets right into it. All completely consensual unless stated otherwise.**

**WARNING for smut.**

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The foreign mission for the elite agents started like any other, just a simple infiltration under assumed identities and it began smoothly, yet out of nowhere it went downhill in an instant. Somehow Natasha and Steve were able to turn it around, getting the information they needed and then fleeing the scene in a haze of gunfire without losing a limb. It came close to disaster, so close that even when they were back in their hotel room they still could not believe they made it out alive of such an impossible situation.

Steve wasn't sure when he and Natasha actually started kissing, he was just suddenly aware of how hard his mouth was pressed against hers and how tightly her fingers were wound into his hair. He was still carrying the bag stolen from their targets, supposedly containing important tactical information. Steve didn't know what it was or why SHIELD wanted it, but he was the man chosen for the mission. The bag dropped as he kicked the hotel door shut behind him, drawing both arms around his partner to hold her tight against him. All sense of reason was forgotten, discarded without care as he picked Natasha up and carried her to the bed, neglecting to be overly gentle as he set her down. His mouth left hers only for an instant before he climbed on top of her, one hand stroking down her slender body, the other holding himself up with an elbow propped above her head.

He was taller than her by a fair bit and much wider than her too, but somehow he still couldn't see her as frail or fragile even when seeing her dwarfed by his large body. Certainly not when she hooked a leg around his waist and flipped them so fast Steve actually felt a wave of disorientation. Without any warning he was on his back, looking up at the gorgeous being that was Natasha Romanoff. She reminded him of Peggy so much though not in the way she looked or dressed, it was the way she walked and talked. The way she set out to get something and got it. Never taking no for an answer, always proving herself without ever really showing just what she was capable of. Never letting a man get the better of her.

Dangerous, deadly and so very beautiful.

He felt a sudden physical need for her so strong it seemed to be impossible. Seeing her above him, feeling her soft lips planting harsh kisses on his neck, Steve gave little thought to the idea that sleeping with his partner was wrong. He knew it was a terrible idea, it could only go wrong in so many ways but the adrenaline from the mission was slamming them both and Steve was just so grateful to be alive, knowing it was partly because of her.

He knew she wasn't thinking either, Natasha would have to be out of her mind to sleep with a teammate. Not because she had such an ethical moral code, but because such a thing would complicate any situation whether on a mission or not.  
Steve wrapped an arm around her slender body, holding her to his broad chest for a moment, selfishly just needing to feel her against him. After the moment passed by he quickly rolled them so he was on top again, his lips now moving to the smooth flesh of her neck as he rocked his hips against hers. His erection was evident now, she would have felt it and that had been his purpose for rolling his hips, an action he quickly repeated.

A groan left his mouth as she responded, meeting his hips while her elegant hands slid around his back. It seemed seductive, but even with the haze of lust clouding Steve's mind he recognized her movement as deceptive. He was very aware that a good deal of Natasha's training and skill set revolved around being able to size up an opponent to take him down. She knew how to win against men much stronger than her, Steve had been training with her enough recently to learn her tactics and even teach her a few things. She was about to try a move on him, he could just sense it and his hands snapped to her wrists to pin them above her head. He then pushed his hips against her in a relentless way as punishment for her attempt to get on top again. He grinned into her neck, tasting her skin felt like a privilege to be revered. And Steve did revere it, for how could he not? How could any man have Natasha Romanoff under him without thinking he was the luckiest fellow in the Universe?

He assumed she liked to be on top, it was really a metaphor for Natasha in a way. She always had to be in control but not necessarily be dominant, just not the weakest person in the room. Steve couldn't see her as weak, she gave him bruises every day that they trained together, bruises that he returned even though it still went against his nature to even strike a woman, let alone a teammate. But after a dizzying kick to the jaw from her he knew he had to fight her or die. She didn't seem to like hurting him either, but they worked so well together and they had learned so much from each other just trading blows.

Steve needed to be on top in this instance, he was her Captain and the leading agent on their mission but that had nothing to do with it. His need was more primal, more instinctual. As much as he loved the idea of her on top of him, straddling his hips, (yes he had thought about it, he would have been lying if he said he'd never imagined sex with Natasha) he just needed to have her under him.

The soldier released his hold on her hands and straightened just a little so he could pull his shirt off, tossing it carelessly to the side. Then his mouth was back to hers and he kissed her deeply, mapping her warm mouth with his tongue. She tasted sweeter than he ever imagined she could, given her tough exterior and hardened personality that she used when interacting with most people.

This was going to be just fucking, he knew that. He had no wants for anything more. Just her body needing his and his very much needing hers. Two bodies filled to the brim with adrenaline needing a release. The moment his shirt was off, her hands were roaming his torso, up his muscular arms and down his back, her nails trailing very lightly over his skin. Her breathing seemed to be in the same league as his, sharp gasps and pants as though his days of asthma were back to haunt him. But it was just her, taking his breath away.

He could have been more gentle, he knew that. But Natasha was not a fragile woman, she didn't need to be coddled and handled with care. Her desire was in her eyes, flashing with lust that he knew mirrored across his whole expression. It took great restraint to stop himself ripping away her shirt, instead he used one hand to unbutton the cotton garment, finding a quiet thought in the back of his mind that wished she was wearing her infamous catsuit instead.

Once she was free of her shirt Steve kissed along the tops of her breasts, his mouth hungry and determined. His restraint having been used up, he ripped the front of her bra and exposed his golden treat, dipping his head to suck on her left nipple.

Deciding he could not take it anymore Steve unzipped his pants and pulled down his boxers to let his length bob freely, before hiking up her skirt and pulling her panties to the side. She was wet for him and he hadn't even touched her there, causing something of a feral growl to leave Steve's throat as he lined himself up without much effort and thrust deeply into her.

There was no love in his movements, nothing gentle about the way his hips slammed against hers. He buried his face into her neck, sucking harshly on the skin almost by instinct, without really thinking about it. He was relentless, he should have gone slower and he should have been more gentle but he didn't even consider it. Her building cries of pleasure encouraged him to go faster, harder than he could have gone with any woman other than Natasha.

He wasn't entirely sure whether he lifted her leg to rest on his should or if she put it there, everything was such a blur. Steve raised a hand to hold it there, his fingers digging into the warm flesh, allowing him to stretch her and thrust so much deeper into her. It was truly heaven to be inside her, nothing could feel more intense than her muscles contracting around his length while he pumped into her.

And when she came, well Steve was nearly blinded. He slammed into her harder as she wore in Russian and Steve couldn't help but think it was the most beautiful sound. He helped her ride it out and followed with her, finding his release before she had even finished hers. With a groan he gave a few lasing thrusts and shuddered, his muscular back arching as he climaxed and shot his essence deep inside her. It wasn't even a moment later that he collapsed on top of her, keeping only part of his weight on his arm positioned beside her. They lay there for a good while, gasping and shaking. Her arms were wrapped around him and he enjoyed the feeling even though it felt like all his nerve endings were tingling. After a few seconds of just catching his breath he managed to roll off Natasha's shaking body and pulled out of her, though they both groaned lightly at the action.

As soon as he did Natasha moved from the bed, sitting up and taking in a deep breath. He'd given her quite a work out, he could tell from the way she was still trying to even her breathing and he assumed her heart beat was positively racing. He reached out a hand with the intention of resting it on her shoulder but she was gone a moment later, into the bathroom and Steve heard the shower turn on.

The supersoldier lay back on the bed, resting his arms behind his head with a lopsided grin plastered across his lips. That, had been incredible. Something they both needed without even realizing it. He could detect the scent of them in the air and her moans and cries kept rolling through his mind. That was something he was going to hold over Stark. He frowned suddenly, remembering he couldn't tell anyone. Sense was starting to come back to him and the Captain side of him was furious at his actions, knowing that was a teammate. But Steve wasn't as regretful as he should be. Sure it was a bad idea, but it had been amazing and she clearly enjoyed it.

She wasn't long in the shower and by the time she came back into the room wearing only a towel Steve was already on his feet with a change of clothes in his arms, ready to take the shower after her. As he passed the shorter agent there was nothing exchanged, no looks or words. But she wasn't giving him the cold shoulder either, it was literally as though it had never happened.

Which was exactly what they needed to be like after something like that. Even Steve didn't want it on the record that he had slept with an agent under his command, it looked worse than an agent sleeping with a commanding officer. He showered just as quickly, soaping up his body and his hair in order to wash away the stink and sweat of sex. Once he was finished he took his time getting dried and dressed, looking over his reflection in the mirror. He was still always surprised when he saw his reflection, seeing the hunk of muscle than had not been there when he grew up.

Steve would never forget what it was like, being a nobody. Being weak. He never gave up, never ran away from a fight, even when he was being an idiot in the process and he usually was. Now he was strong, he defended those who were weak. He flexed his biceps, eyeing them in a studying sort of way, knowing they held much more strength than they appeared to.

As he turned he caught sight of the scratches down his back, noting the perfect lines. Fresh and raw they could only have come from Natasha. He didn't know whether to smirk or frown that she had marked him in such a way and he hadn't even noticed, too wound up in the pleasure she gave him to notice the pain. He admired them before dressing himself and fixing his hair back into the swept over look, a style he still kept from the early days. The days he still missed.

When he stepped back into their room he saw Natasha was already dressed and at the window in a position that clearly said she was on guard. She looked to him for just a moment and gave a nod of greeting. Her usual nod of greeting that told Steve yes, they were going to pretend nothing happened. That there was no mind blowing sex in their hotel room.

"Two hours till extraction." She told him before glancing back to the window again, a firearm in her hip holster. Steve knew she could get to it before anybody had a chance to fire at her first. Natasha was the perfect modern warrior in so many ways, Steve was very away of this.

"Yes Ma'am." He nodded, sitting down on the edge of the bed. He may have been the commanding office on paper and in rank, but she led through half the mission and Steve had no problem with that. This was her wold more than his, she knew how it worked and Steve felt like he was still learning sometimes, as though he had been awake for only five minutes and not a whole year.

He watched her carefully as her eyes darted around to the street below. She had chosen the room herself, making sure it was not on the floor and somewhere at the corner of the building. The more possible exits, the better. The room had a view, it was just over a large park but still nice to look down at. But Steve knew she was searching for danger, not enjoying the perks of their accommodation.

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**I know it's only one chapter but please review, tell me if you think it has any potential.**


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